A New Chapter and A Letter For My Future Self.

How many years has it been since my last fall down? I've have change to a new book since then. Chapter after chapter and the flips continues. Funny enough, every past chapters is supplied with tons of endless drama. Lots of promises, lots of changing and I'm going through every pieces of it with out even a slice chance of giving up.

I have changed a lot doesn't it? My attitude, my goal, and other things that I may or may not have realize. I believe some people would said that I'm the same as before but I would to disagree. No one know me best other than myself. Everything about myself. And honestly I don't give a shit about other thing besides myself.

I rarely talk about Malaysian politics nor world's affair. Because for me it was a total bullshit if I ever probe any further into that matters. Somehow I found myself were absolutely shallow about it and I would rather avoid the topics and talk about something with less tension. I had a deep jealously of the people who can talked about it freely and still can stand their grounds.

And I need to find a new title for my new chapter, which begin next week. With just a blink of an eye I am this close to enter the fifth chapter of my life. I am a bit frustrated because I can't remember the previous chapter's title nor that I save all of its content. Well, perhaps I will laugh to myself ten years from now after reading this entry. Hi me! Surprise! I hope you will not be as unsettling as me right now. Ah, may be I should write an entry to myself ten years from now.

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Dear 33 years old Kuntil Midon,

Hi, how are you now? Did my wish came true? Or does it still in progress? I hope everything is going according to plan. Well, I might not be the happiest you in history but right now I am pretty much content with my life. I've been avoiding myself from getting into the deep shit up until now. And I have all sort of trouble but so far, I've settle the personal nicely. Even though it is still a little bit shaky but I trust myself that I could handle it.

The significant others? I'm still searching for a better one and I hope you would not entangle in some out of love commitment that I found rather stupid right now. If you hate it, I remind you, you better fix it before it is too late. Just try to love once again and don't believe on any cliche fade away flames, you could just light it up once again using a cheap lighter and the burning is still the same.

How much clean income do you have now? Do you happen to be a millionaire in that age? Well, if you're on your way, I would like to remind you to always put your family first. Do not grow up to be a grouchy old man who can't remember his own birthday. If things got complicated, run for a while. Escape to somewhere other than that place. Find your inner peace and don't forget to comeback and settle the score once and for all.

Have you quit smoking by then? I hope so. But I doubt that I can now. Well, you know guys and their pride and talks and all. More importantly I'm going through the toughest phase of my life right now. There is a lot of things need to be settle ASAP. Anyway, I hope you will read this once after your 33rd somehow. Even you're already 69, it is still not too late to read these. But I'm hoping you still remember this blog address but just don't blindly start your car to find the house. It doesn't exist in your world grandpa. And remember, Kuntil Midon is just your pseudonym.

Yours Truly,
23 years old Kuntil Midon.

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"Kiss me now that I'm older, I won't try to control ya." - The Strokes, 12.51.